Are You Getting Somewhere Or Did You Get Lost In Amsterdam

For clarity’s sake I’m going to have to do this next post in installments. The last two weeks were a whirlwind of adventures starting with Cally and I literally running onto a train from Paris to Amsterdam seconds before the doors closed. Four hours later we arrived and checked into one of the grungiest hostels I’d ever seen. We dumped our stuff onto two top bunks in a stiflingly hot, somewhat smelly 18-person dorm room inhabited by, among others, a middle-aged snorer we later appropriately dubbed “Weezy” and went off exploring.

Amsterdam is without a doubt one of the most beautiful cities I’ve ever visited. The weather was gorgeous, the canals, cobble stone streets, and quaint row houses were beyond charming, and the whole city exudes a sort of laid-back vibe I’ve never before encountered. I may go back and live there one day. During our stay we visited the Anne Frank house, the Heineken brewery, a cocktail museum, some vintage shops and flea markets, and several of Amsterdam’s claim to fame: coffee shops. We also visited Amsterdam’s Holland Casino, mostly because we had a coupon allowing us free entry. We stayed a total of 10 minutes during which time I managed to render a slot machine completely non-functional by putting a 50 centime coin in the coin slot instead of a token.

The only experience I would say was not a positive one occurred the second day with the consumption of a particularly potent weed brownie. I’d been told that weed baked goods could be pretty intense, but I wasn’t prepared for just how long I’d be high and how disorienting it would be. After consuming the illicit sweets and sauntering to the southern end of the city, Cally, another friend, and I readied ourselves to visit the Van Gogh museum. Upon our arrival, we discovered the museum cost an entirely unreasonable 15 euro and decided it wasn’t quite worth it. We instead bought some ice cream cones and sat in a park where we encountered one of the cutest babies I’ve ever seen. The three of us sat on a bench and watched this baby play for an obscenely long period of time. At one point, someone whipped out a camera and began taking “paparazzi shots” of this baby. I reminded him that this was not only creepy but also probably illegal.

A particularly notable feature of Amsterdam is its high population of bicyclists. The streets are constantly full of them and it is important to remember that they rule the road. Not only won’t they stop for pedestrians, but they rarely attempt to maneuver around them. My quick realization of this fact is the only reason I wasn’t mortally wounded and thus could easily relocate to the next stop on our journey…